Why I Stopped Setting Goals in 2026
This blog is based on my video on the same topic. Watch it here.
Every January, we sit down with the best of intentions. We choose goals. Sometimes we choose a word of the year. We promise ourselves that this will be the year we finally follow through.
Then, a few weeks later, life happens. Motivation tanks. The vision is dimmer, our best intentions abandoned. Many of us shrug it off as another year gone.
And most of the time, it’s still January!
So what gives? Do we have the fortitude of wet paper bags? Are goals just out of fashion? I don’t believe either of those are true.
Your goals didn’t work because they weren’t rooted in identity—in who you wanted to be instead of what you wanted to accomplish. We only ever want stuff for who it makes us become anyway.
So this year, I chose a different approach.
Instead of setting traditional goals or picking a word of the year that, let’s be honest, I’ll probably forget about come spring, I asked myself a deeper question.
Who do I want to be in 2026?
Not what, but who.
That simple shift changed everything.
After writing romance novels for over a decade, building a backlist, meeting deadlines, and living with the constant pressure to produce, I realized that chasing numbers or arbitrary milestones is pretty damn depleting. I wanted a life that felt calm, creative, spacious, and—most importantly—joyful. A romanticized life, to use my favorite phrase…even in the ordinary moments and especially in the challenging ones.
So I began designing my days around identity instead of outcomes.
Here is what that looks like in practice:
Moving my body in ways that support strength, flexibility, and energy, not because I want to lose 10 pounds or dislike the way I look
Creating quiet space in the morning for prayer, meditation, and gratitude before engaging with social media
Showing up at my keyboard with consistency to keep those creative home fires burning
These three simple habits allow my nervous system to feel safe and regulated. No longer am I disciplining myself or time-blocking. This is about inspiration, flow, and, I’ll say it again: ease.
When you decide who you want to be and be her now, your daily choices naturally begin to support that version of you. You stop chasing motivation and start living in integrity with that ideal version of yourself.
Thanks to my new mindfulness habit, Lemmon Society Magazine was born. Not from forcing creativity or setting a business goal to make millions, but from a space of service. I know the content inside of this digital publication as well as the unfolding of it inside The Lemmon Society membership will support women on their journeys to slowing down, enjoying their lives more, and embracing the idea of calm, peace, and ease for themselves.
Romanticizing your life doesn’t mean we’re no longer ambitious or we don’t want to be millionaires. Quite the opposite. It means that while pursuing these dreams, we are unwilling to sacrifice the core of who we are—spiritual beings living in human bodies, here to make the world a better place. It means choosing growth that feels nourishing instead of exhausting. It means allowing success to be built from a space of purpose and peace, not outside pressure.
Sound impossible? It’s not. In fact, it’s my life’s purpose to live a joyful, romanticized life and teach women across the world to do the same. And it’s easier than you think.
If you’ve ever set beautiful intentions only to feel disconnected from them weeks later, maybe the problem isn’t you. Maybe you were just at the wrong starting point.
Try again. And this time, instead of asking, “What do I want to achieve?” try asking:
“Who do I want to be?”
xo,
Jessica 🍋